DISQUS

Morus · 9 months ago

I like the slogans for Brown's Lukewarm!

On only a slight tangent, this appeared on PB.com a while ago. My favourite is the Robyn Cook one.

“Just as US President Andrew Jackson had his ‘Kitchen Cabinet’ let us imagine Gordon Brown’s ‘Drinks’ Cabinet:

Douglas Alexander - Scotch - Liked by fewer people than who claim to
David Miliband - Sherry -You can imagine Old Ladies being fond, but not really anyone else.
Alistair Darling - Port - Liable to induce headaches and drowsiness
Jack Straw - Vodka (& coke) - NuLabour yet also an Ex-Trot: Detente in a glass
Hillary Benn - Brandy - Cultured, and seems older than actually is
Ed Balls - Bourbon - brash, clumsy, poor immitation of Scotch (see above)
John Hutton - Absinthe - Doesn’t mix well with other drinks mentioned
Harriet Harman - Advocaat - completely useless, and no-one has any idea what it is doing in the Cabinet
Hazel Blears - Moonshine/Poitin - Detestable in small measure presented, would be unbearable in larger quantities
Alan Johnson - Bailey’s - A little slippery, a little cloying, liked by the ladies apparently
Ruth Kelly - Vegetable Oil - Simply doesn’t belong
Peter Hain - Orange (crushed) - no explanation required
Margeret Hodge (aka Proms hater) - Soda Water - no f***ing taste.”

Then people started adding their own suggestions:

Gordon Brown - bitter (Old Peculiar)
Lord Soames - stout
Iain Duncan-Smith - mild
Vince Cable - pint of Brains
Michael Howard - something of the nightcap?
Peter Mandelson - Campari and Orange. Deeply and satisfying bitter.
Clare Short - A Bitter Lemon
Robin Cook - Whisk(er)y and Ginger
George W Bush - N(oil)ly Prat
George Galloway - VERy big MOUTH
John Prescott - Punch
Dennis Skinner - Bols o(r) Ver(mouth)
Vladimir Putin - White Russian
Dmitri Medvedev - Moscow Mule"

Fabienne · 9 months ago

Nice list. Some harsh ones in there [bitter lemon? ouch].

John Prescott - Punch

Egg Nog followed by a weak punch maybe.

No Babysham for Tony Blair then? Or perhaps some illegal Hoonshine - may lead to blindness....

andrewroche · 9 months ago

Implement this and see a rise in black market booze, or like Paul Flynn MP said, a wave of Welsh alcohol tourism.

Fabienne · 9 months ago

Alco-tourism is something we are already quite specialised in, so some cross-border Frosty Jack smuggling should be no problem.

FuziSlippers · 9 months ago

Ah, the slippery slope of sin taxing. While himbos may not be on the list of likelies, I wonder how long it will be before condoms are taxed.

Fabienne · 9 months ago

I wonder how long it will be before condoms are taxed.

One of Gordon's taxes moves I did agree with was his VAT cut on contraceptives [see here]. Can't say than I am more than a few pence up on that deal yet, but a move in the right direction all the same. A less generous friend of mine summed up the move at the time as, "One big prick giving a tax cut to thousands of small pricks". Not a bad summary of some other tax cuts are politicians make actually.

FuziSlippers · 9 months ago

True, guess with HIV/AIDS and other sexually transmitted horrors, taxing condoms would be a bad idea. And lol on your friend's quote.

an ex-apprentice · 9 months ago

Dear Miss F.A.B,

Positively effervescent. Whatever it is you're not drinking, make mine a double.

Fabienne · 9 months ago

Best get your requests in for this bar shy student before I am priced out of the market. Cheers!